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Thursday, June 2, 2011

The Final Count Down

In 9 very long slow days Josh and I will b back together for 4 very quick days but I know both of us really need this right now. On Monday he and I will have been apart for exactly one month and it really is hard. I have tried to find things to do, and trust me there are many of them, but nothing seems as appealing as doing nothing for those four days. Let the single digit count down begin I suppose.

Patience has never been my strong suit, that was his job. The reassuring words that everything will be alright and I love you's seem to be all that is keeping us going each day. He works long days and because I am travling so much this summer I'm not which at times feels lke prison. I'm not one of those people who likes down time, I like being busy, but planning a wedding is not enough. How can that be right? There are so many things to do and only 69 days to go until I do, but all the big things are finished with the exception of my dress. (I suppose that is pretty big).

It feels weird making all of these decisions for one day apart. I know that everyone thinks that guys dont really have an opinion when it comes to a wedding, but that isn't what I'm looking for. I'm looking for someone to reassure me that all of these decisions that we are making are good ones. So much goes into a wedding and at times it feels like we are having to make important decisions that we should be able to discuss on our own.

The four days he is here will be packed with things to do. Engagement photos, finalizing invitations, meetings to get reccommends amongst many other things. I honestly can't wait though, as busy as it may be quailty time is the only thing that has been on my mind lately.

A month away from your best friend is one of the hardest things that could happen after becoming engaged. You would think that after writing letters for a year while he was on his mission that this would be cake, but emails are the most impersonal form of communication. Yes, you get them immediately and all the words are there just as they are written, but the emotion isn't there. Atleast when you are waiting for a letter you can see all of the smears and smudges of hand written words.

Since I have been back in the states we have been able to Skype each night which has been amazing. I feel like I'm in high school again where neither one of us wants to get off the phone because saying goodby sucks. Most nights we talk until I fall asleep or atleast half asleep exchange goodbyes just to do the same thing the next day. Keeping myself busy had been key. Only 9 more days...

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